Michael A. Gordon, CPA – World’s Largest Classified Ad

WE’VE BEEN ORPHANED

After 8 years our “Team Mom” has taken on a new challenge. She was awesome; we miss her and wish her the best. And now, after an appropriate period of mourning, it’s time to hire a replacement!

We need to add a special person to our administrative staff. My goal with this ad is to entice you to want to work here so bad that you’d crawl across broken glass just to apply for the job.

So, rather than starting off by giving you some laundry list of what your “duties” will be, I think I’ll tell you what it’s like to work here.

Our office is a fantastic place to work. We are a CPA office with a staff of 6. To most people, that would dredge up images of us preparing all kinds of tax returns, doing bookkeeping and payroll services, and engaging in a lot of business consulting. Well, that’s all true. We do all that. And we do it very well. But working here entails a whole lot more. Our work philosophy centers on family first. So, for example, if you have a child that has a baseball game today at 3 p.m. you had better be there at that game…or you are in trouble! Nobody will care, 20 years from now, how many files you put away or phone calls you took. But your kid will remember that you weren’t there for the game!

Next, we are a very informal office. We laugh a LOT. We enjoy each others’ company. We have a great relationship with our clients and treat them as if they’re family…because they ARE. We even treat EACH OTHER like family. You will be surprised by my staff (they are strong, independent thinking, caring people who take their job seriously). You will enjoy working with them. You will learn a LOT.

During tax season, I have a massage therapist that comes in weekly and gives the whole staff 15-20 minute massages…and I pay for it. After tax season, this same person comes in once a month. I think my staff would SHOOT me if I discontinued this.

Almost every Thursday my wife cooks us up a gourmet lunch (if you don’t know who my wife is, you need to ask someone). We close the office for at least an hour (and don’t answer the phones) and FEAST. This alone is worth that “crawl across broken glass” I talked about earlier.

 

The “Laundry List” (scary stuff)

So, I’ve given you a feel for what it’s like to work here, hopefully, some of you are starting to get your interest piqued (or maybe you know someone who would be perfect for us). Now it’s time to give you the laundry list…in a non-laundry-list fashion, of course!

This person will be, first and foremost, a genuine “people person”. All of the other qualifications combined are not as important as this one. Next, this person will enjoy meeting and, eventually, getting to know our clients…and I don’t just mean their names!

When I tell this person that I am out of small post-it notes, I know that she will have 3 of them at my desk and I won’t have to ask a second time. When I give her a task, I know she’ll get it done efficiently. This is a person who never runs out of work. This person is always cheerful. She NEVER EVER says “that’s not my job”. This person is very detail-oriented. She’s not a “yes” person…but she IS a team player. She has no fear of coming into my office and being frank and honest with me…or any of my staff. But she’s never rude, pushy or inconsiderate when doing it. This person loves to answer phones and has a great phone voice (she even sounds like she’s GLAD to talk to the caller!). This person comes into our offices and picks up our “shredding” piles without our having to ask. When the copier is doing weird things she deals with it promptly. She has high energy.

When the office is low on supplies, she goes out and gets more (she probably won’t even tell me she is going out!). Keeping the office clean, taking out garbage, getting the recycling center to come get all the shredded paper, etc., etc…..none of these tasks are too daunting! She’s confident, happy, full of life, ready to take on whatever comes her way, and shrinks back at nothing. She doesn’t just water the plants, she talks to them!

 

Some experience with QuickBooks and Microsoft Office would be really nice (but not a deal breaker).

 

Okay…I could probably go on and on and on…but, hopefully, you are getting the picture. Remember, I have only ONE goal for this ad. I want to spark the right person (whether that’s you or a friend of yours) to respond NOW. We want this person as soon as possible.

 

Hours and Pay (NOT full-time)

This position will require outrageous flexibility. It will NOT be a full-time position. It WILL be full time (and maybe plus some) during tax season (January through mid-April) and then will drop off. Outside of tax season there will be weeks where we will only need you for 1-2 days. Other weeks we may need you for 3-4 days. So, like I said, outrageous flexibility.

Next, this is NOT a high paying position. You will not be buying that new BMW on this salary. BUT….you WILL be paid fairly, you WILL be treated like gold, and you WILL be treated like family. You WILL wake up in the morning and feel GOOD about coming to work. Nice!

 

Who might this PERSON be?

This person might be someone presently working somewhere but not happy. This person might be a professional who just wants a change of pace. This person may also be a mom who has raised 4 kids and is ready to get back into the workforce. It’s the PERSON I’m looking for….not your present job, or lack thereof. I don’t care if you have decades of experience or no experience.

 

 

WHAT DO YOU NEED TO DO?

Okay, I sure hope I enticed some people to respond. If that’s the case, you’ll need to know what to do. By the way, please feel free to pass this ad around to friends and relatives!

 

First, prepare a simple resume. It doesn’t need to be pretty, cool, flashy, bizarre or anything like that. The simpler the better. If you are the mom I talked about earlier, then for “work experience” put down “I raised 4 kids for the last 15 years”! Believe me, that’s work experience!! And it counts! By the way, it does not have to be done on a computer….hand-written is fine (but your writing must be very legible) if you don’t have access to a computer. If you want to attach one or two referral letters, please do….but it won’t hurt you if you don’t.

 

Second, take a single sheet of paper and put your name, address and phone number at the top in the middle. Then, tell us something about yourself, or why you want this job, or what makes you unique….honestly, all I want from this is a “peek” into your personality. If you hand write it, that’s okay, but it should be very legible. Be simple, real and direct in what you write.

 

Third, visit my website at www.mikegordoncpa.net I will ask you about this.

 

Fourth, take the resume & sheet of paper and get it to Tammie at the office. How to get it to her? E-mail it to her (tammie@mikegordoncpa.net), bring it in, snail-mail it in, whatever.

 

This is a great community with great people. We are very lucky to be living here. I just know that the right person is out there and we are looking forward to meeting you.

 

 

Michael A. Gordon, CPA, LLC

Not Your Basic Bean Counter

290 S. 4th Street, Coos Bay, Oregon 97420

541-269-1272